nirnaya

March 28, 2008

“Since the end of something marks the beginning of something else, and the beginning of something irrevocably marks its own end.” – me, 18th of June, 2006.

I have no long, drawn-out, well-articulated reason nor a poignant last post.
The truth is that my heart is no longer here.

You have been the best of readers. Thank you for everything and may God bless you always.

just joking

March 26, 2008

During a project group discussion yesterday, my groupmates and I were coming up with our presentation on Concept Teaching and Jigsaw, for next week.

We were thinking about what would be a good example to use in class during the presentation, with our coursemates as test-subjects. All 3 guys (C, J and K) were staring intently at the books in front of them.

Me: I know! We use the nursery rhyme Jack and Jill..and we have them in groups of 4..one person on “nursery rhymes”

All 3 of them: *nodding intently*

Me: ..one person does “gravity”..

*C , who at that point was drinking his coffee, snorts, sputters, laughs, chokes, does a funny dance while trying not to spit out his coffee, ends up spilling it on his shirt and spitting the rest back into the cup. J and K fall back into the sofa laughing*

Me: I didn’t even get to the 3rd person! That person should do “Turbulent BGR”, obviously..

*C is laughing so hard he’s wiping away tears*

Me: *serious look* Ok. I’m sorry. I will try not to be so funny anymore.
*All 3 of them start laughing again*

J: *shaking his head* gravity..your class is going to be the one where they’re always laughing.

Me: I hope so.

Somewhere there’s speaking
It’s already coming in
Oh and it’s rising at the back of your mind
You never could get it
Unless you were fed it
Now you’re here and you don’t know why

But under skinned knees and the skid marks
Past the places where you used to learn
You howl and listen
Listen and wait for the
Echoes of angels who won’t return

Everything you want :: Vertical horizon

As my mind wandered while listening to old(ish) songs on the bus ride home, I thought about how 26 suddenly seemed particularly daunting. Not the age per se, nor the increased responsibilities it would inevitably entail, but the thought of how much I’d have to put into this 26th year to make it seem worthwhile. I thought about how I don’t know what those things actually are. About how I seem to make “resolutions” (sometimes, only because I know there’s no point getting carried away with them) but even then I rarely get around to fulfilling them.

I thought about what I would write here when I came back to this page (yet again), thought that “Vertical Horizon” would be a good name to give this blog as I ended 26yrs of existence (and to mark its impending 2nd). A revamp seems in order. A change in tone to mark my change in mood.
Then I changed my mind.

And as I look at this White Square filling up with thoughts about thoughts, I realise the fact still remains: this blog is comatose. Like me.

random dream # 3579864

March 17, 2008

I’m at a camp for kids. I’m of the adult facilitators.
Anthony Bourdain is the facilitator of the next group.
Together we’re standing and singing “Breakfast at Tiffany’s” with the rest of the kids while someone plonks along on a piano.
………
Now the damn song’s stuck in my head.

I’ll be honest about it. It is not atheists who get stuck in my craw, but agnostics. Doubt is useful for a while. We must all pass through the garden of Gethsemane. If Christ played with doubt, so must we. If Christ spend an anguished night in prayer, if He burst out from the Cross, “My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?” then surely we are also permitted doubt. But we must move on. To choose doubt as a philosophy of life is akin to choosing immobility as a means of transportation. ~ The Life of Pi

For the first time in a long time, I’m re-reading a book. As I started on it again, I wondered how many years had passed since I read it last. Amazingly, the answer was somewhere around 5 years?

Him: Ah, credence!!
Me: Huh, what?
Him: Eh. I meant ‘crap’. I have no idea why I said that.
Rest of us: uhm… …..

It’s been a long, long week. For some reason, it felt endless. I think the rain’s had something to do with it. Seeing gloomy rainy days 2 weeks straight has a way of screwing about with my sense of time. It feels like midday in the morning, and late evening at noon. Adding to that, the same faces at every class, every day, with the same jargon going round and round, and it feels like you’re on a sick cycle carousel (hmm that came out of nowhere).

But I am learning things, contrary to what people fresh out of NIE say. True, there are somethings we’re doing which are a significant waste of time, but still there are other things I’m learning, which I’m glad for.

I got to spend an increased amount of time with my parents this week, and i really am glad for it. My mom’s been spoiling us with good food, all the meals I’ve had home this week have been mini-feasts. I think the workload from school’s really wearing her down. She won’t admit it, but the rest she’s had this week has done wonders for her, visibly.

I know I’m in for an exhausting ride when I start teaching again. It won’t be relief teaching, or contract teaching anymore. It’ll be full-on, full-swing. The expectations of me will be so much higher. I cannot imagine how I’m going to squeeze in having a life practicum-onwards.

The last 2 days, my right heel’s causing me unbelievable distress. I’ve got this unexplained pain in my heel when I put any weight on it and I’ve been limping around :( It’s also caused me to miss my 3rd yoga lesson, so byebye Certificate of Completion.

I’m doing a case-study on Asha Gill for a Communications Skills course and in my quest to look for videos online of her, I’ve gotten significantly distracted. Suddenly I realize that my casual jest to a course mate in class last week might actually be true.

“Well, atleast it’ll be fun looking for stuff on her. She’s totally hot.”

as we should too!

March 15, 2008

State passes droopy pants law | Oddly Enough | Reuters

To be honest, I don’t see what’s so odd about it.

It’s pretty ridiculous wearing your pants halfway, or totally below your ass. Have you seen those boys walking around? They have to walk funny because the pants is always slipping off. It makes NO SENSE at all. And it’s even more ridiculous when students do that with their uniforms.

Do i really want to see your butt crack or your whole stupid butt as i’m happily walking in the mrt station? NO!

This is a picture I did not take of the world going by as I sat snug and warm in our car, seeing how the golden-yellow sunlight hazily diffusing through the mist made the world look so much prettier and happier than it had in days. Lost in my daydreaming reverie, as my eyes drifted to the pick-up truck on my right, I noticed the young Indian man – tanned and lean, with wind-tousled hair, wearing a worn out pullover and jeans, sitting with his back against the cold metal of the truck. This is a picture I did not take of his handsome brown eyes and their look of utter loss, as he stared out at the same world going by on a cold misty morning.

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